I get so frustrated sometimes at the very different standard of expectations and reactions for the behavior of adults and children. Read More
My nine year old son Noah is a very deep thinker. He can get so lost in thought that he misses everything going on around him. We can be anywhere, doing anything, and Noah will still be deep in thought about whatever topic he’s currently obsessing about. (This week, it’s chimps. As in, the ape/monkey things.) I never have any idea what is swirling around in his amazing mind until he comes up to me with another question. Yesterday, I was right in the middle of something important when I heard a little voice, “Mommy? Which animal is more intelligent? An orangutan or a chimpanzee?” Read More
Several years ago, Brent attended a motivational conference for business in which Zig Ziglar was the main speaker. I’ll never forget how Brent came home and described the session that first day.
He said the audience was absolutely captivated by Zig Ziglar and hung on his every word.
Have you ever thought about what your Christianity speaks to your children? Are you captivating your children with your values, your morals, your Jesus-likeness?
I’m going to be honest. There are parents who are turning their children off to the gospel and the Christian life– Read More
We’ve spent the past 13 days talking about gentle grace parenting principles. I absolutely love this definition of grace:
Grace–the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings. Read More
Compromise–“an ability to listen to two sides in a dispute, and devise a compromise acceptable to both”.
Sometimes we need a compromise in a parenting problem. This idea is taboo to many authoritarian parents. The prevailing thought is that my will, my authority, my expectations, and my commands must be “won” at all costs over the will of my children. Read More
Let’s pretend you’re building your dream house. You hire a general contractor and draw up the plans together, scrutinizing over each corner of this new home. The land is carefully purchased, and the necessary permits to begin building are acquired. The night before the ground breaking seems to last forever, as you’re too excited to sleep. When you arrive at the build site the next morning, the general contractor and his crew have already assembled. You jump out of the car and run over to them, anxious to see their progress, only to stand there in dismay. “What is going on?” you think to yourself. “Why aren’t they working?” You look closely, and realize that every single member of the construction team has shown up with only ONE tool on his toolbelt–a hammer. “Where are the rest of your tools?” you shout to everyone. “You can’t build my dream house with only ONE tool!” Read More
There is great power in human touch.
Babies in orphanages die without it.
Marriages fail when there isn’t enough of it.
And all children crave it desperately.
A hug. A quick cuddle before bed. A pat on the head that says, “You’re mine.” A touch to the back that says, “You can do it!” A single fingertip, gently caressing a little cheek. An Eskimo kiss. A tickle fight. Arms to hold a grieving heart. A hand-in-hand walk that shows you belong together. Read More
Correction. Correction falls into the realm of parental teaching. We correct (verbally teach/remind/reprimand) for things that are dangerous (hot objects, busy roads), inappropriate (burping, standing on tables at mealtime, throwing food), unkind (hitting, ugly words, mocking, hurting others), dishonest (lying, stealing) and more.
We teach the meaning of NO through repetitive review and correction. These “rules” should be based on our family convictions (which should be founded on God’s Word), and should be taught diligently (repeated, reviewed, reinstated) to our children. Read More
I came across a parenting blog on child-training the other day, and reading it literally made me sick to my stomach. Sadly, I believe the author to be a very purposeful Christian mama who is striving to raise her children to love God. Her methods, however well-intended, were painful to read. She has deemed herself as her very young children’s “ruler”, and spends her days setting up conflicts with them so she has opportunity to “discipline” them. Unrealistic age expectations, unrelenting control (the words “battles that last for hours” flow through the blog), and very un-nurturing parenting practices, coupled with parenting-to-impress strategies and abusive discipline…well, like I said, I came away almost weeping for those little children. Read More
Our family was at a Chick-fil-a children’s play area recently, and while our younger children played, I found myself noticing another mother trying in vain to get her two children to come down out of the play structure. She tried calling nicely, then she tried shouting meanly, then she tried threatening (“No ice cream for you!”), then she sat down in frustration and waited for the children to decide to come down on their own. It was a dramatic scene for all around, as the children ignored their mother’s repeated pleas for obedience. Read More