In the last post we talked about Sibling and Friend Relationships. But in this post, I am going to talk about teens and parent relationships, and how it’s extremely important to have a strong relationship with your parents.
Have you ever thought to yourself when your mom or dad is disciplining one of your siblings, “I would NOT do this, this way, or I wouldn’t be that soft on him if I WERE THE MOM!” Now, I would say that we teens with siblings have thought that way MORE than once! Wouldn’t you? Maybe you wouldn’t have the courage to say that out loud to your parents, but maybe you think that of your mom or dad sometimes. 🙂
Or maybe you struggle when your parents correct you or point out something they want you to work on. I sometimes struggle with that, too. Nobody likes to be wrong or have their faults pointed out to them.
When you’re in your teen years, you start to kind of be judgmental to what your parents do, regarding discipline, or how they chose to parent your siblings, or other decisions they make. Do you know why? It’s because your brain is changing from a kid who loved to run around and play on a swing set to an adult who wants to be independent and make your own choices, . Your brain is maturing into an adult brain, rather than a playful child’s brain. And it’s hard! But you have to realize that your parents know best. And how many years have they been parenting and having their own family? And how many years have you been doing it? 🙂 If you do the math, I’m pretty sure that they’ve been doing this longer. LOL. For now, they have more lifetime experiences. And your turn will come! You’ll be able to one day say to your kids, “Hey look, I was a teenager and I know what it’s like to think you’re an adult. You’re NOT an adult yet, one day you will be. And one day you’ll be able to make those decisions for your family.”
Hey teens, your parents really do know and want what’s best for you, and they’re not trying to make you as miserable as possible! They love you and adore you and want to see you succeed! They’ve been “you” before, and they understand that it’s hard sometimes, but always try to be respectful to them.
It is so important to work on a great bond between you and your parents. A relationship that you’re comfortable sharing anything with them, even your deepest darkest secrets. And my parents have always said, that if maybe I don’t agree with something that they’re doing as a parent, come and talk to them. Just make sure it’s privately! Sometimes I would say how I felt out loud around my siblings, and my mom would say, “You’re welcome to tell me how you feel about this or that privately and respectfully, but not around the kids.”
Your parents want to be on the same page as you are. Just remember that you’re a TEAM. You’re in this stage of life together!
The other thing I want to mention is… Respect. In the world today, kids are so disrespectful to their parents. I’ve been around teens who talk badly or flippantly about their parents behind their back. This is gossip! Maybe you say, “Well, my parents just don’t listen to me when I try to share my feelings with them.” Have you tried it respectfully? I’ve found that our parents are more likely to listen, if we come to them with respect. “Mom and Dad, I really don’t understand why you do this, do you mind helping me understand why?” Now they may say “No, you don’t need to understand why we do this.”, then just say “ok” and obey. 🙂
It’s not easy, but it honors our parents and the Lord.
Teens, let’s try to show respect to our parents in our words, actions, and thoughts. Our world needs a generation of teens who are willing to obey their parents and show respect. Plus, I bet it will make your parents happy, and I KNOW it will make God happy.
I would love to talk to other teens about their struggle with Parent Relationships in the comments below!
Ellie Rose, 13 years old